[BARC] Boring Report

[Lew]

Wow...What a great club we have!
     Bert snuck a beacon up on top of k7fl's place...and k7fl thought it 
was a mini-frisbee!!! At first the beacon was on a secret 
frequency...and it still is. Only true radio guys can find it. That is 
in order to confuse the IRS and the FCC. I tried to find it at my house, 
but couldn't. I guess the dipole and the HeathKit I have doesn't get the 
right frequencies.
     So I went over to Dr. Big Gun's place. He has a bunch of towers and 
radios and wires and stuff. He wouldn't let me try to find the beacon on 
anything other than a ft-817..a really tiny spy kind of radio that can 
be run off of vinegar and cat poop. After Dr. Big Gun let me work up on 
his towers for 6 hours I turned on the 817 and started listening.
     There must be a bunch of beacons on a bunch of frequencies, because 
I found a slug of them. But finally on 432.142.5 Giggle hertz or so 
(Thats a code to throw off the IRS) I heard the neatest, coolest beacon 
in the world. I heard a bunch of V's, then k7rat/b then cn85ss then Bert 
threw in the coolest fooler of all by ending it with "AR".. He is so 
smart to throw the revenuers off the track by making them think the 
beacon is in Arkansas..or that the guy back on the E. Coast did it and 
is noting his accomplishment by signing with his last 2 
letters...although you're not supposed to do such things unless you've 
been certified as retarded...but I don't know if the AR guy is tarded or 
not...so I'm confused.
     The beacon didn't make the S meter move at all, but Dr. Big Gun 
says its Q5. He also says that if it gets spotted on a ClusterPacket, 
then the spotter will become damaged and become a Goat. Sometimes I 
don't get all the stuff just right..but I'm pretty sure thats what he said.
    So now the CLub has its first beacon.
    Wow...The Boring Amateur Club sure is a neat-o group!
      73 and I remain,
      Domitrix